we're chasing vodka with high fives
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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