THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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