Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
