Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
