i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize