If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
