He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
