she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
