Can Purell be used as lube?
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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