jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
