Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
