sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
