help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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