Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
