I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
i want to swaddle you in tequila
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize