thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
Randomize
