I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize