Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
