okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
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