nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
