I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
