somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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