so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
