Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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