If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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