i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize