I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
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