Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
