As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I am midnight drunk by noon
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
