i would punch a child for taco bell
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
