FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
