We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
