New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
only if we run a train.
done.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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