are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
