this beer tastes like vomit already
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
