So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
