What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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