do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
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