i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
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