Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize