Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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