I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
