Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
