is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize