Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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