she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
