well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
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