the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
