he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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