after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize